The Struggle is Real // Week 3

Biblical Theology of Counseling
Various Passages October 6, 2019

I. Introduction:
A. This morning’s message is going to be different from what you are used to getting when we open up a passage, teach
what it means and then apply it.
B. What is going to happen today is you are going to get:
1. Over 40 years of studying Scripture
2. Over 60 years of living with and struggling with my own soul
3. 34 years of pastoral ministry and care of others’ souls.
4. What I have learned from others over these years from those who specialize in these things
C. So these converge together to form my biblical theology of pastoral counseling for ministering to a damaged soul,
someone else’s and your own!
D. As I share this my hope is that it will help in three ways:
1. Those who are struggling with something in their own souls will get some direction on how to think about these
things and how to begin to approach them
2. Those who are basically doing OK right now in their souls would find out things that will help them excel still the
more in their soul since none of us will be perfect in this area.
3. Finally, it will equip all of us a bit more on how to think and help others we love who are struggling deep within
their souls. You might call it a biblical/pastoral counseling 101.
E. So over the past 3 months I have worked hard trying to summarize all my thinking and understanding in a simple way
that can help us with these things. I encourage you, if you are interested; to go to the web page and download the
document that I created that summarizes all of this so you can use it for yourself or helping others!
 Let me start with an...
II. Overview of the whole process (See 4 page Handout)
A. The process
1. Commission – sins done but should not have been (sexual or verbal abuse). Omission – should have been done
but was not (told you’re loved or received affection and affirmation)
2. Room of works looks like - when we try to manage our sin through willpower, the process looks like this:
sin...confess... do better for a while, and then sin again. Embarrassment, confess again, ask God to take away
the desire, then sin again, confess again, sin again, confess again, shock, more determination to stop sinning, think
about it a lot and examine it. Make promises, create some boundaries, and sin again, now even worse than

before. Despair, anger, shame, distance from God and guilt. Self-condemnation, self-loathing... sin again.
Disillusionment, doubt, self-pity, resentment at God: Why doesn’t He hear my prayers? Why doesn’t He do
something? More anger. Then fear because we allow ourselves to get angry with God. Then real confession, a
heartfelt one, and a sense of cleansing. Ah, a new start. Things seem to get better. Yeah, I finally got this sin
under control. Oops, sin again. Desperate efforts and bargains struck. Once-and-for-all healing. Really, mean it
this time. Sin again. Lose hope, give up, rationalize, minimize, blame, pull away, hide, judge others, put on a mask,
sin again, and so on.
B. The room of grace
1. Radical Honesty .... Radically honest look – the opposite of that is denial, suppression, not wanting to talk about it!
2. Like denying you have cancer and thinking it will take care of itself or just go away. It will eventually overtake you
and destroy you!
C. The past
1. Read statement at the top
2. At the end of describing how to address the past. The emotional resilience class that starts this Tuesday here at
MVC will go into this process much deeper. At Next Steps Table there will be more info and resource cards about
all of the resources we have available for you during this series.
D. Spiritual warfare
III. Conclusion
A. Ps 127:1 says “unless the Lord builds the house the laborers labor in vain”
B. The best information, processes and programs do not have the power to transform a life, only God does that!
C. There is a special meeting between man and God when we prayerfully depend upon God and do the due diligence to
put ourselves in the places where God is working.
1. Some of those places you will find on the resource card at Next Steps Table
D. Thus this week we are moving into a week of prayer where we are calling the whole body to come and pray for one
another and our loved ones as we are asking the Healer Himself to do things in our souls that only He can do.
E. Josh will explain a bit more about this.